Celebrating 50!
“A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies…Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all. Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Proverbs 31:10, 29-30
Friday, Elena celebrated her 50th birthday! What an incredible party with the House Church Leaders and other close disciples at the Prestons on Sunday evening! Tony Untalan grilled several juicy ribeye steaks and smoked some tasty salmon, while Russ Preston grilled some unbelievable chicken! Our sisters, especially Therese Untalan, Lana Preston and Marcia Bertalot, went “all out” in decorating the house and planning the party. Marcia even made Elena’s favorite dessert, white chocolate macadamia nut cheesecake! Then to top off the evening, we had a time of sharing. Sister after sister in tears shared their appreciation of Elena for her unwavering, joyful perseverance in the Lord as well as the upward call of her Sarah-like “quiet and gentle spirit.” All the brothers likewise shared their heartfelt appreciation for Elena’s leadership of the women, her discipling of their wives and kindhearted friendship to all, especially to their children. I was honored to share last. Even at this difficult hour, Elena’s and my love is stronger than ever after almost 29 years of marriage! She is my best friend, my lover, awesome mom, greatest critic, most loyal partner in the gospel and my dear sister in Christ!
Elena Garcia-Bengochea was born in Havana, Cuba on September 2, 1955. She is the third of five incredible children of Dr. Ignacio and Carmen Garcia-Bengochea, whose grandparents were immigrants from Spain to Cuba. Interestingly Ignacio was a classmate, though with extremely different political persuasions, of Fidel Castro in a small Catholic boys high school! At the beginning of the “Castro Revolution,” Ignacio daringly moved his wife and family of then four kids from Havana to Gainesville, Florida where he eventually received a PhD. in civil engineering from the University of Florida. Elena lived in Gainesville from four years old till her graduation from the University of Florida in 1976. She attended P.K. Young, a private high school, where she was Homecoming Queen, Student Body Treasurer, straight-A student (no Bs!), Captain of the cheerleaders as well as Captain and number one on the tennis team!
It was after a Friday evening campus devotional at the Crossroads Church of Christ that I first met Elena. Carmen, her older sister, already a Christian, had invited the soon-to-be freshman Elena and her boyfriend to devotional and had asked me to reach out to her boyfriend. Though he became a friend (and still is) and we studied the Bible, he left at the end of the summer to Yale. After their break-up, Elena was baptized into Christ on August 8, 1972. (I was baptized as a freshman on April 11, 1971.) On September 25, my younger brother Randy was baptized. The following day, I shared God’s plan of disciples only dating disciples and talked about having a double date with him to the “Gator” football game on Saturday. At first he said he knew no one at “the church.” But after I insisted he get a date, Randy said, “I don’t know her name, but how about that Spanish girl?” I said, “You mean Elena?” He said, “Yeah, she’s great.” I tactfully replied, “Hands-off, she’s mine!” I surprised myself (and Randy) with that intense statement! I had told myself not to be interested in her as she was my friend’s former girlfriend. Anyway, I went home after my conversation with Randy and asked Elena out for the game. She said yes!
We “dated steady” for three years and were married by Chuck Lucas and Sam Laing December 11, 1976. Then our dream of working together in the ministry became reality, when I took her back to Charleston, Illinois where I was the campus minister for the Heritage Chapel Church of Christ. (Roger Lamb was the preacher.) In less than three years on a small campus of Eastern Illinois University (9,300 students), God blessed us with 300 baptisms! Yet, that first winter, Elena was doing her occupational therapy internship in Champaign, Illinois, an hour’s drive away. That winter the snowfall was near record-breaking and the adjustments to marriage, daily eight hours of internship and ministry responsibilities proved almost too much. One night after an argument, in tears Elena said she wanted to “go home.” I too cried and apologized for not taking care of her. Then in April, Roger and I were “fired” by the church of Christ that supported Heritage Chapel. Our ministry was called “pentecostal” for our zeal and hand clapping during our singing. Elena never wavered in being by my side, as God gave us financial support in two weeks!
Later in April of 1979, the Lexington Church of Christ (later the Boston International Church of Christ) asked me to become the preacher and be the campus minister. (After my sophomore year, my ministry dream was to be the campus minister to Harvard.) When we asked several disciples for advice, the responses were either negative or neutral to our potential move to Lexington. This was largely due to their concerns that Lexington was a dead church, where only two had been baptized in the previous three years and it was located in New England, a “difficult mission field” in the opinion of most in the mainline churches of Christ. In contrast on the night of decision, Elena simply said, “Let’s follow your dream!” We arrived in Boston on June 1, 1979. That night was the famous devotional in the Gempel’s living room with the 30 would-be-disciples! We lived with the Gempels for two months and built a “forever friends” bond that lasts to this day.
In 1981 our first child was born. It was then after studying the Scriptures in Titus 2, we saw Elena needed to be discipled as a young wife and new mother by Pat Gempel, a strong, spiritual “older” woman. In spite of facing criticism inside the church for her decision to only work part-time in the ministry while raising our children, Elena continued to be abundantly fruitful in her Bible Talks and be attentive to our children’s needs.
The years pass and the Spirit through the Boston Church sent out mission teams, the leaders trained by me and the women trained by Pat and Elena. In 1982 there were the church plantings to Chicago and London. In 1983 came New York. Then came a flurry of plantings; Toronto (1985), Johannesburg (1986), Paris (1986), Stockholm (1986), Kingston (1987), Bombay (1988), Cairo (1988) and Tokyo (1988). In 1988 the World Sector Leaders were selected. This caused rumblings throughout campus ministry churches as well as mainline churches because we built a formal central leadership. Persecution escalated against the Boston Movement churches as we were cut-off from the mainline, one of the charges being we were a “cult.” Yet Elena was amazing in her loyalty to God, the cause of evangelizing the world, to the movement and to me.
Though by this time we had three children, Elena was likewise zealous for us go to the mission field. In 1989 we planted Manila and Bangkok as well as lived in Cairo for a month under several death threats to us and our family. Elena powerfully discipled the sisters, loved our children and never felt overshadowed by me but was indeed the “wind beneath my wings.” In 1990, the Spirit sent us to Los Angeles to serve a hurting church of 154 disciples. Here we labored joyfully for many years. Yes, making many mistakes, but God blessed us with church plantings to Jerusalem and even Moscow, which we led with the Flemings. God allowed us to oversee a church growth movement of “sold-out” disciples that by the year 2000 reached 171 nations! The Holy Spirit grew the Los Angeles Church to an attendance of 15,000 and a membership of around 10,000 disciples. Also during the 90’s Elena successfully fought for sisters to be respected by being officially employed and paid for their services in the ministry.
Then in 2001, one of our children began to struggle. Some was our parenting. Yet the viciousness of attacks on us and our children almost destroyed our faith. My leadership sins had produced bitterness and rebellion in many we thought were our friends. We went on sabbatical in the fall of 2001 and resigned in 2002 as Leaders of the World Sector Leaders. At this point we felt “no one came to [our] support, but everyone deserted [us]. May it not be held against them. (2 Timothy 4:16) Yet Elena stayed by me. In all of it, though our faith became quite weak, God refined and strengthened Elena and me through those difficult and lonely days so that “the message might be fully proclaimed and all the [world] might hear it.” (2 Timothy 4:17)
The Spirit took us in July 2003 to Portland, Oregon. Battered, we were warmly received by a devastated group of less than 100 disciples, none of who had ever been in our ministry. With not enough money to support us, we “tapped” our retirement fund to stay in the ministry for God. With Elena’s encouragement, I preached again. This time with a strong focus to protect and strengthen the weak. After all, God had made us weak, so we could relate and build His church in grace and love to comfort them. (2 Corinthians 1:3-11) In two short years, God has blessed our efforts with an attendance of 450 on Sundays built through many baptisms, restorations, move-ins and a very high retention rate for those who are baptized!
On Thursday, September 1, 2005 as we headed out for a two-day getaway to celebrate Elena’s 50th birthday, I received a startling phone call saying I would not be teaching at the Leadership Conference in Seattle because of perceived “divisiveness.” As always, Elena consoled me and was 100% supportive of me. As we traveled along the Oregon coast through such beautiful towns as Florence, Newport, Lincoln City, Tillamook and Seaside we once again dreamed of discipling couples to plant churches that would evangelize the world in the 21st century. During the sleepless night of her birthday, we went outside at 4:30 am. God’s stars were multitudinous! The presence of God was almost overwhelming. We then went back inside, prayed and fell asleep. I awoke next to my beautiful bride in the brightness of the sun on a new day.
Kip McKean